Out of the hearts of babes….

A buddy of mine sent this to me.  Sometimes, there’s a refreshing honesty about the psyche of kids that we tend to lose when we get older:

(this is my personal favourite:)

MIA’s Missing in Action (in every sense of the word!)

British-born Tamil vocalist & songwriter, Mathangi ‘Maya’ Arulpragasam (Or popularly known by her performing name ‘MIA‘) has had a very musically successful 2007. Of late, she has garnered many column inches and pages in magazines due to her hard work, controversial political views and her critically acclaimed album, ‘Kala’.

Due to her sell out gig at the London ICA last week, another concert was arranged at the Coronet, Elephant & Castle. The missus managed to get a photopass for the gig. I’d already taken pictures of MIA, but wasn’t really happy with the results. Anyway, got to the venue which was already packed out. The spirit of Ebeneezer Scrooge was living on at the Coronet because the heating was switched off and it was flipping freezing. That still didn’t deter people from wearing just a t-shirt. Scratch that for a laugh!

As is normally the case, the lighting was really bad, and made even worse because of the smoke machine. To be honest, I was too cold to worry about that: I just wanted to get the shots I needed and get out. MIA was scheduled to perform at 9.15. No show. 9.30, no show. At 10pm, still no show. Of course by this time, the crowds were getting really irritated and the last thing I wanted was some beer flying into my gear. (Which has happened before!) I had already seen MIA’s play list and I just knew that there’d be no way she’d be able to play the whole set, considering the venue’s curfew was for 11pm. When MIA finally did appear, she was all over the place and started to get the crowds worked up. Of course for the photographers, it was always going to be a challenge: if it wasn’t the bad lighting, it was going to be her hair all over the place. But there was something missing from the gig. She just didn’t have that razzmatazz about her. The show seemed flat, and there just wasn’t that spark. I actually do like some of MIA’s stuff, but yesterday’s show was just dire. If anything, you could say that it was , “Eano Thaano!!” (Tamil for ‘half-hearted; lukewarm). Shame the same couldn’t be said about her tour manager. (whoever the heck he was!) Towards the end of the third song, this bearded gangsta/santa wannabe suddenly appears on the main stage and starts ‘commanding the photographers out from the pit as if we were street urchins. I swear, from the way he was enthusiastically perching off from the stage, if he had slipped and broken his neck, I doubt any of the photographers would have had any sympathy. So, muppet: whoever you are and you just so happen to be reading this, I might have a Christmas present for you: Free vouchers to ‘Ak’s School for Good Manners’. If you’re really good, I’ll throw more lessons in for free. The syllabus includes how to deal with photographers as human beings, and not being an arrogant schmuck! Come to think of it, why ARE most of these tour managers really up their own backsides like the nincompoops they set themselves out to become? I reckon that’s for another blog.

On the whole, how would I rate the add on MIA show? Well, it could have been better. Thankfully it wasn’t as bad as the Go-Team gig.

Anyway, a shot from the night:

How NOT to spare the rod… in the UK, apparently.

I truly, truly believe that there is a huge difference between discipling and abusing a child. Not so, according to England’s Children commissioner in the UK.

People who know me know where I stand on this issue. If you don’t know, please stop by an earlier blog.

Have a great evening, people. Oh, & G, Have a safe and great time out there.

Stop & Search, black hair & Angie Stone at the Jazz Cafe!

According to the Keith Jarrett, UK’s top black police officer, he wants to demand more ‘Stop & Search’ initiatives among ethnic groups within inner-cities. Of course, this request has opened a can of worms and controversy, but before people go out and crucify the guy, there’s a point I thought might be worth considering: Mr. Jarrett happens to be in a position where he has access to stats and information about crime situations and who is committing what by  various types of people. He has more insight than what we might find out from the news (which, in my opinion, can be very biased!)  I have witnessed on so many occasions in my neighbourhood  groups of young black boys who actually cause trouble, and the police, irrespective of their colour, can’t do anything, because they have been caught up in the red tape of ‘Political correctness’.  Yes, there will always be discrimination, irrespective if a person is in uniform or not.  Now, I am not, in anyway, insinuating that black kids are more liable to commit random acts of violence and such. However, considering young black people have enough bad press and reinforce certain stereotypes as it is, is there really any crime in ‘Stop and search’? If anything, better safe than sorry, I reckon.  But that’s just my opinion. I had a rant about this topic ages ago here.

While on the topic of black, I was reading Hannah Pool’s feature on why do hairdressers charge more to cut afro hair?  Thankfully, I don’t have that problem.  With the joys of Gillette Mach 3 and shaving gel, I embark on the path to Planet Bald. Beautiful thing is: it costs less than £10 a month!  Whooho!! In your face, hairdressers all over!!

Finally, here is one decent shot (I think!) that I got at The Angie Stone gig at the Jazz Cafe, yesterday night.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: DO-NOT-COME-BETWEEN-A-BLACK WOMAN- AND-THE STAGE!! Enough said about that. But, if your curious about what I mean, read a previous blog I’ve written about this.

The fabulous Angie Stone:

“Y’knahmsayin?!?!” Vs “Yegitme, blad?!” (with pictures of Philip Glass & Patti Smith)

Y’knahmsayin
	Slang for {You know what I’m saying?} and means “Savvy?; Got it?” Today, we be gonna have a party, y’knahmsayin‘?

This instance took place yesterday very briefly while I was in Central London. I couldn’t but help overhear the conversation between two young boys, whom I’m going to assume are cousins. It was a moment when two different, yet very similar youth sub-cultures from the UK & the U.S, began speaking in English, but within 10 seconds, deteriorated into another form of pidgin:

Yank: “Is it always this busy in London?”

Limey (slang for Brit) youth: “Every day..”

Yank: “Y’all reckon is dis bad in Philly?”

Limey: “Nah, blad…is peeps and all them foreign tourists, Yegitme, blad?

Yank: “Y’knahmsayin? Brotha can’t do **** ‘out some fool walking up in his space!!”

Limey: “Yegitme, yegitme!”

Yank: “Y’knahmsayin… am I like, niggaz gat to recognise..”

Limey: “Yegitme…!”

Their whole conversation seemed like an episode of Beavis & Butthead. By this time, I reckon I had heard enough and was getting fed-up dragging my feet alongside the other thousands of people zombie-fied walking along Oxford Street. So, I took a short-cut out, thus never really hearing the end of that delightful conversation.

Anyway, on more of a pictorial note, I was assigned to cover Philip Glass (I had no idea who this dude was until I had to google him!) and Patti Smith at the LSO yesterday night. A really good concert with renditions of poems and such. Photography wise, a bit of a nightmare because it was really quiet and you could hear every noise from the shutter release, that was even beginning to annoy me! That apart, here are some pictures from the gig:

***My missus has commented on the second picture I took and honestly thinks there’s a striking resemblance to John Lennon. So, If you ever get to read or see this blog, Ms. Smith, I’m not sure whether you’ll take that comment as a compliment or an insult!***

Taxes, dieting and being Gay (a J.J.C perspective…)

(***JJC: a hick person foreign to ways of a new country***)

You know, until I came to this country about 11 years ago, there were a couple of things that I never really understood or I was totally ignorant of or maybe just in deep denial. I don’t know about you guys, but growing up in Nigeria, being ‘gay’ meant being happy, jovial and merry. That’s the interpretation I knew then, and I’m still sticking to that! Dieting: What the heck is that? Eat, drink & be merry was the order of the day. Being healthy was one thing, but dieting?!?!  And let’s not forget the all powerful taxation system. Sure, I did work in Nigeria, but either I was totally ignorant of being taxed or I wasn’t even taxed at all.

It was only till I came to the UK that I realised that being ‘Gay’ was being a Homosexual; dieting is a prerequisite to desire a body that, let’s face it, unless you have a fast metabolism, personal trainer or money for a tummy tuck, you’re never going to achieve ‘the perfect body’. Finally, Taxes took a whole new meaning and eye opener for me when I got my first pay check with a chunk going towards taxes.

Anyway, it’s the new start of music season, so here’s a couple of shots of Matt Schofield, a Blues guitarist who, for an English dude, is really, really good:

What’s the hype with gaining access to ‘VIP’ rooms at clubs??

I don’t think that I will ever be able to understand the concept of VIP rooms at nightclubs. I’ve never been to clubs out of my own personal interest, only as a photographer who’s freelancing to cover a gig or the other. I’m given a wrist band that gives me ‘access all areas’ at these venues and I just have to laugh at the whole absurdness of the VIP package. It’s a kitted out enclave which is roped off and guarded by a steroid fulled ‘Kunta Kinte’ bouncer. You have a long queue of people trying to get into this claustrophobic setting just to be seen to have mixed with the ‘stars. “But I have the right wristband!!” or “I’m a friend of XYZ!! We did a movie together!!”

Then you realise that what you thought was the ‘V.I.P’ room is nothing but a room just for ‘V.I.P’ wannabes that hold on to their bottle of champagne for dear life and somehow you notice later on in the night that they are still holding on to that same bottle of champagne. You begin to suspect that they might have a hidden teaspoon to gauge how much champagne they are going to drink.

No, the real ‘V.I.P’ rooms are within an inner chamber that just wreaks ‘exclusive’. I have seen debauchery at its worse. You don’t want to know how much I’ve seen people spend on just drinks. Damn!! I could spend that money on a whole new camera kit!! I remember asking a club manager why there’s so much hype attached to ‘V.I.P’ rooms. He’s response was simplistic and realistic: “It’s an indulgent life-style to show off and if there’s a sucker who feels that they have to inflate their sense of ‘worth’ and spend ridiculous amounts to make a point, my team and I will be right here to make a profit out of it!!”

I’ve managed to get into one of these ‘V.V.V.I.P’ rooms and for the record, I don’t understand the hype attached to it. Maybe I’ve just never been comfortable with that kind of living… Oh well: to each his own!!  I mean, if your really going to be in a vip room, I want to be pampered and then some!!

Oyinbo discipline

Not too long ago I witnessed a sight that I thought would never ever be feasible again in ‘Liberal UK Today’: An oyinbo (i.e. ‘English’) parent actually disciplined a child that, quite frankly, had it coming.  What’s more, the parent was actually applauded by bystanders.

It all happened when I was on my way to the doctor’s and I saw the mother trying to calm her child down and simultaneously trying to be to be as patient as possible.  From what I gathered, the kid wanted a toy and the mother couldn’t afford it. That was all the excuse the child needed to start a kicking tantrum.  The poor mother had to deal with bags of shopping, bad weather and a banshee of a child no more than 6. Suddenly she snapped.  She delivered a backhand slap that was E forun, E gbati & Egbarun: all 3 well known Yoruba slap simultaneously colliding into the pale flesh of this kid.  A slap that was operatic in its delivery that would have impressed many African Parents.  The child never saw that slap coming.  It must have done the trick because that kid shut his mouth up; save for the sniffling normally associated when you’ve just received some form of punishment.  I honestly thought that the
NNSPC police would roll up and arrest her, but no.  The mother did console her child but I guess her message was clear: don’t mess with an already stressed mummy!

Ahh, it brings back memories of when I was disciplined by my folks, a story many other Africans can confirm!

BBC Racial stereotyping?

Maybe I’m being paranoid but I’ve noticed a reoccurring sight on the BBC National breakfast news that I personally feel is a giant conspiracy to reinforce stereotypes.

There was a report not too long ago about whether children are being taught the value of money.  A televised survey was shown and all those asked on what they ought to do with their money said that they’d use their money to buy games, clothes and the latest mobile.  Shortly after that report a couple of days later, there was a feature on dangerous dogs.  Who were being questioned about the ‘virtues’ of owning such dogs and the value of money? Why, young black men, of course.

Initially I dismissed these instances as coincidences. That was until last week when the BBC national news was reporting on the issue of low achievement and unemployment.  Who were those being questioned: young black teenagers.  This morning, the BBC breakfast news ran a news piece on the ongoing debate about the age of teenagers leaving school being raised from 16-18.  The BBC also discovered that many teenagers were opposed to this idea of raising the age limit.  Who were those lined up to comment about this? Surprise, surprise: young black teenagers who were not eloquent on air AT ALL!!

Now, I don’t go around reading too much into the semiotics of situations nor about anything that goes wrong with society is based on the colour of one’s skin, but from what I’ve just observed in writing, am I being overtly suspicious about this?? Are young black kids, who have somewhat of a negative image in the British media, the only people to comment about issues that are negative?

If you think I’m making it up, watch the BBC breakfast news (not the regional service, but you may as well get lucky!) and judge for yourself?  Damn, I don’t want to pay a monthly £12 TV licence for a service to give the wrong impression about all young black kids!

(** This is purely an observational opinionated view.  All constructive comments are most welcome!**)

“Let’s talk about sex, pupils!”

According to the official body for inspecting schools in the United Kingdom (Ofsted), youngsters believe that parents and teachers are not doing a good job talking to them about issues of sexuality.  Pupils would rather source all the information and advice they need from magazines, in spite of the explicit content some may contain.

It would seem that in many quarters parents and legal guardians are either too embarrassed or couldn’t really care less about talking about sex.  Remember watching a film or a wildlife programme when you were younger with your parents, and then the scene cuts to a lovemaking scene?  There was usually an awkward 3-second silence before you suddenly realised that you had to finish your homework, or worst still you have a sudden desire to go to the toilet!  (Ye-ye people!! Think of that last statement in anyway you want!)

I’m not a parent, but I’ve been in a position of responsibility that I’ve had to talk younger charges about hormones, sexual sensitivities and such.  To be quite honest, I’ve never been fazed by the whole sex education issue. How can I be, when my Nigerian parents gave me this talk about sex.